Monday, January 30, 2006

New Viruses

The George Bush Virus - Causes your computer to keep looking for viruses of mass destruction. The John Kerry Virus - Stores data on both sides of the disk and causes little purple hearts to appear on screen. The Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard Drive ; with NO memory The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to keep counting and re-counting The Bob Dole Virus - Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 200 GB hard drive shrinks to 100 GB, then slowly expands to re-stabilize around 350 GB The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care The Michael Jackson Virus - Only attacks minor files The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy ... then discards it through Windows

6 comments:

Mitey Mite said...

Now this is funny.

mrshellonheels said...

LOL thanks for the laugh!

OldGuy said...

These are great Guppy, especially the Lewinski one.

Thao said...

All of those are funny! Thanks for the laugh today.

ender said...

lmfao ... that's hysterical

jayne d'Arcy said...

The Bob Dole Virus actually sounds like an advantage. We can sell those new harddrives on eBay!